Why? because sometimes talking about sex can happen in funny situations so it’s important to laugh. So here are a few funny stories that I have heard about how parents have told their children about how babies are made and vice versa…. and we can all have a laugh at the same time regardless of how we feel.
A parent to child conversation about how are babies made?
1. In the shopping queue at the checkout at Kmart..surrounded by many people
Child to parent: How are babies made?
Parent to child: I bought you, at Kmart because you were on special.
2. At a local soccer game where my friend’s six year old son asked a large lady how a baby got into her tummy, (she was not pregnant!). She was gorgeous and responded by saying thank you for the compliment, but it was fat and not a baby! She told the boy to ask his mum and guess what, that’s what he did!
Child to parent: How are babies made? (in car on way home from soccer)
Parent to child: I found you on the soccer pitch! (Oh dear!!)
3. At a restaurant with a friend who is pregnant and once again surrounded by many people.
Child to parent: How did a baby get into your stomach?
Parent to child: You were on the menu.
4. Child to parent: How are babies made?
Parent to IVF child: You were mixed in a glass with sperm from dad and an egg from mum and I swallowed you.
A child’s view about how are babies made?
1. My mum swallowed a watermelon seed and it grew into a baby and then she vommited me out.
2. At a big family gathering where my sister-in-law bought her dog, my 10 year old niece explains to everyone when she sees the dogs humping that the dog’s penis will go into the vagina and that’s how a baby dog is made. Well hello how are you?
3. My friend’s daughter age 5, announced to me that she knew how her mum had given birth to her recent sibling …she said he grew inside my mum’s belly until he just fell out one day and the doctor caught him.
4. At one of my ‘Amazing Me’ programs one of the children came up to me afterwards looking rather shocked. He said that his parents told him that he was very special. One day they were cooking and put two baby making ingredients in a bowl and mixed them around and he was made. He was a gorgeous IVF baby after all.
What have you told your child? You might be surprised as to how these funny conversations may open up opportunities to talk about lots of other difficult topics. These conversations will ultimately strenghten your relationship with your children no matter how old they are. Let’s face it, ultimately isn’t this what we want?